Perhaps I Have Become Insensitive...

I watched on the news today about a 23 year old state resident who while out enjoying the summer weather, trying to catch a break from the heat was struck and killed by lightening. The lightening strike also injured 4 others in the same pavilion that this gentlemen was seeking shelter in. Hundreds of people were around him, reports say people came to his aid including State of CT employees who work for the Department of Environmental Protection. His heart had stopped beating, he was in Cardiac Arrest, no AED's were readily available in close proximity, he lay waiting for minutes before the first AED would arrive on scene. He was transported to Shoreline Clinic and pronounced dead some minutes later.

In New Haven in the last 3 months two people have died in Pedestrian hit and run style accidents. In April a 27 year old Medical Student from Yale was struck and killed by a vehicle that fled the scene. Last week a 5Th grade student an 11 year old girl was struck and killed by a vehicle that was drag racing which also fled the scene.

These incidents have received local news coverage for a day or two and then have slipped into the forgotten events, to only be felt by the families and friends of the victims. However a recent incident in Hartford, one in which a 78 year old Male was walking across a busy street was struck by a vehicle that was chasing another vehicle on the wrong side of the street. Both vehicles subsequently fled the scene, leaving the victim lying in the busy street. This incident however was caught on camera, and in an effort to catch the eluding vehicles the Hartford Police Department released the video which would later spread around news outlets through out the world.

Hartford Police Department Video of Park Street Hit And Run

The media began running the story of how demoralized the City of Hartford had become, that pedestrians and traffic could just drive by and that no one came to the aid of the victim. The story gained national media attention, and even appeared on The Today show. The victims family spoke out against the community wondering why no one rushed to helped their family member. Now while I feel sympathetic towards the family, no one should go through the pain that they are feeling, of having a love run struck down and have the offender flee justice. While the video shows that no one immediately rushes to the aid of the victim, audio tapes have also been released from the 911 calls that came pouring into the emergency dispatch center at Hartford Police Department within seconds of the accidents. The video also clearly shows that people in fact did go out into the street to the victim, while no one immediately comes to aid the victim I have to ask, what good would it have done? The Police Department was on scene within 2 minutes of the accident, and EMS was on scene within 4 minutes of the accident with the victim being at Hartford Hospital 15 minutes after he was struck. The common person does not know how to properly aid an accident victim, I'm not sure what people expect from the community? Did they expect to the community to rush to this victims aid, a person who evidently had a serious spinal injury, to drag them out of the street to what they thought would be a safer place, to perhaps compromise their severe spinal injury even more? How would you feel if instead of doing very little they walked up and robbed him of his wallet and personal belongings as often happens in this neighborhood.

Perhaps I may come across insensitive, or uncaring in regards to this situation however it is the opposite. I know the family, I know the neighborhood, and I know the people and the way they act. I do not think this neighborhood is entirely uncaring as I have seen the exact opposite displayed on many occasions. I disagree with the way the media is covering this story, especially on the national level. It also disturbs be that this particular story is getting so much attention, and others are being left behind. This gentlemen had every resource available within minutes and has thus far survived because of such, where as a 23 year old has died quite possibly because of the lack of an available AED. Perhaps his injuries sustained from the lightening strike were so severe, but perhaps a readily available AED in such a public place with so many risks would have changed the outcome.

Then again this is only my personal opinion on these matters, and I'm sorry if I'm seen as insensitive, perhaps I am, perhaps the job has changed me.

Sitting on the bench

I am still very new, very fresh, the ink on my letter of medical control is still drying. I am ready for whatever may be thrown at me, ready to jump into the unknown, waiting for the big one, aching for another tube... instead I have found myself fighting pure boredom, listening to others do the "Good" calls.

I have been out on my own for just over a month and a 1/2 now and I have felt as If I have seen nothing and that I have accomplished little. Sure I have done the shooting, the stabbings, the acute MI, the acute respiratory distress, But I have been waiting for the Cardiac Arrest, waiting for the heart pounding anxiety, the dance around death, the indescribable feeling of a successful intubation except to those who have done it and yearn for another. I have listened to other Paramedics go out on Cardiac Arrest calls, heard of a coworker and classmate doing back to back Cardiac Arrests, and I felt as if I have been sitting on the bench and waiting for my chance to get in the big game.

I received a letter this week from a Patient I had recently treated. While I won't go into details of the call for confidentiality reasons. This was one of those routine ALS calls, where I felt I barely made a difference. I put the Patient on the monitor, ran a 12 lead, started an IV which I think I even missed the first time, and gave them some oxygen. I felt like a machine on this call, I felt that I was doing what an EMT could do with less training then I had. What I hadn't realized is that during this call, the way I talked to my Patient and explained everything, the calm cool demeanor in which I performed my skills, and the simple act of giving up the pillow from my stretcher to this patient made all the difference in the world to them. They didn't care that I wasn't pushing medications, performing life saving interventions, I did a job that they respected and thought was under recognized. They appreciated what I had done and they made it known by writing a letter to thank me for the treatment I had given them, because to them I did everything right and the best I could and made them comfortable in the midst of their emergency.

This letter has adjusted my outlook and feelings at work, I am trying to embrace the routine. Another local Paramedic recently asked how one can learn to deal with the routine and asked for other Paramedics input and advice:

Baby Medic: The Routine

For me a simple thank you has worked wonders, I realize that as minor and boring as the routine may be, to our patients it is a significant time in their lives, and the way we treat our "routine" ALS patient makes a difference in their lives and their perspective of EMS. While yes I still yearn for the "Big one" for now I am just grateful for the opportunity to make a difference in a life as little as it may be, even if its just a warm hand to hold. It is these moments that I got in this job for, to make a difference.